Why is giving better than porn? They’re much closer worlds than you think. 20 years ago, you had to put your mac on, head down to the newsagents, stare down the guy behind the till, get a brown bag, rush home… To give you had dig out your cheque books, write a cheque, post it, hope it arrived…

Phones have changed everything for porn, but so has auto-correct. What if an auto-correct error leads you into porn? Ben Dover and his colleagues in the porn industry know how to exploit technology for porn, to grab your attention, to make you addicted. But it doesn’t satisfy our deepest desires. He’s spent most of his life thinking that sexual urges outside of committed relationships are bad – but they’re just an expression of our need to connect with others. Our challenge is to channel this into something long lasting. If you want to know if something is good for you, ask where it’s leading to, and where it leaves you.

The giving sector is floundering, losing the attention of this generation. The porn sector is thriving. The giving sector has settled for transacting financials, rather than creating transformative experiences.

We’ll all leave here, go for a beer, and head to bed. If we have discipline, we turn off our phones, and leave them charging. But most of us leave them on by the bed, waiting for a ping from any of the world we connect ourselves to through them. . We have a choice – we can choose what we access through the tiny window. One world offers an illusion of connection, and one offers real, maningfull connections. One offer quick fixes, the other long-term solutions. One subtracts from our lives, one adds to them.

The little actions we take add up to more than we realise.