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Some of us are lucky enough to be held as a baby, and be given undivided attention. Some of us are lucky enough to be held as our lives end. But too often there’s a gap between two people – a compassion gap.

Janice is a woman who doesn’t use words to communicate. She just has here eyes and face. Her body is twisted and misshapen, and she needs help with everything. He wanted to connect with her. He spent time just being with her. If he mimicked her body a little bit, she would look up and her eyes open a little. How would it be if he quietened his minds as well as his body? A dance of quiet attention grew.

Lilly was a woman who he was blessed to live with in his own home, which was open to dementia sufferers. She no longer really understood ordinary objects, and couldn’t string sentences together, but she could still communicate and understand love. She had a loving appreciation of a moment with Andy’s Mum.

He invites us to be aware of our chairs and quieten our minds. It allows us to encounter ourselves, become aware of our own self-compassion. 

Consider the ripple effects if we come to know our quiet mind. We create ripples of anxiety and unease everyday. Spend some quiet time, becoming interesting your state of mind and heart every day. You’ll create ripples which join together in a wave of compassion. He’d like a world where our hospitals, schools and care homes were reliably kind.

What qualities do we seek in people who care for us?

• Gentleness
• humour
• time
• affection
• respect
• kindness
• love
• empathy
• a smile
• compassion
• no agenda
• acceptance
• honesty
• more interested in you than themselves
• a listener

It’s his conviction than we can meet weakness and need with compassion.